Fruit & Veggie Magic

Share this post

Fruito the Ripenificent was a world famous fruit magician. For years he had competed for top billing against Vern the Vegetastic until Vern suffered a fatal injury while trying to extricate himself from a giant zucchini flower into which he had been stuffed head first (top hat, tails, and all) before it was filled with 200 pounds of mozzarella and then fried Roman style. Fruito had, of course, sent his condolences to the entire Vegetastic family, as was customary at the time for competing fruit and vegetable illusionists. Later, he was overheard in a London pub to say rather dryly, "At least Vern was a man who died as he lived, with a pistil in his hand."

Verne’s cousin Artie, who was lamenting his familial loss with a third glass of wheat grass at the pub, overheard Fruito and, feeling his family name had been muddied, challenged him to a duel in his preferred fashion—choking at less than one pace. Artie choked but Fruito was ripe for the challenge and gave him his patented Banana Peel Slip, neatly escaping Artie's attack.

But after that Fruito never performed publicly again. His art may have been lost, but his lessons are still preserved to this day. The obvious ones are part of children’s lore even now. Things like "Don't eat cherries while wearing a white tuxedo and trying to extract venom from spitting cobras with your feet" may seem obvious lessons for the youth of today (dry cleaning a white tux is expensive) but back then it was novel.

peachesRecently however, a mustachioed journalist discovered Fruito's hidden tomb and unearthed his secret book of magic, which was profound in its simplicity. “Ripening,” it said, “is the key to all good tricks with fruit.”

Interestingly enough, nature imitates art. Just as Vern’s act started out great and then would decay; so do vegetables - they are ready to eat when picked and then begin to degrade. Fruito would start out slow, build to a crescendo of perfection, and then wind it down - just like summer stone fruit in the orchard. They continue to ripen after being picked, reach a peak of ripeness, and then decay.

So know that peaches and nectarines are ripe and juicy when soft to the touch; that nectarines aren't as astringent as peaches so some folks like to eat them firm. For best flavor, I would recommend not refrigerating. You can store them in the fridge if necessary, but they get brown and mealy when held between 36 and 46 degrees.

Enjoy and be fruitful!

- Chris Mittelstaedt chris@fruitguys.com

Sign up for our monthly newsletter

 

Recent The FruitLife articles:

Profiles of the men and women of the fruit world
August 24, 2016
Family and sustainability are core values at Frecon Farms
July 27, 2016
How to help save the endangered Gravenstein apple
July 27, 2016
Reflections from Lagier Ranches, 2014 Community Fund grantee
June 29, 2016
Honeybees land at FruitGuys HQ
May 24, 2016

More recent articles:

How food in the office impacts productivity
February 23, 2017
A good self-care regimen can help you feel better faster
February 22, 2017
Climb the stairway to wellness with a workplace stair challenge
February 22, 2017
Do the old rules about not talking politics at work still hold?
February 21, 2017
Food:
A primer in praise of the potato
February 13, 2017
The FruitGuys donated 2 million servings of fresh produce in 2016
January 24, 2017
Why music boosts your exercise sessions
January 24, 2017
Food:
Blood oranges and kumquats star in a heart-healthy Valentine’s Day dinner
January 19, 2017
Six easy ways to make your workplace healthier
January 11, 2017

About Us

Our monthly online magazine features articles about fitness, health, food, and work, as well as recipes featuring farm-fresh fruit!