The Fonz and the Grapes (Aesop's "Happy Days")

Share this post

By Chris Mittelstaedt

Early November, 1975. Richie, Chachi, and Ralph Malph are drinking milkshakes at Arnold's Drive-In Restaurant, swapping wholesome fantasy stories about catsuit-clad rock star Leather Tuscadero. Joanie, aka "Shortcake," stops by and crowds into their booth. "Hey guys, what's up? What are you talking about?" The awkward silence of three embarrassed teenage boys blushing and choking on their tongues is deafening. The Fonz changes the subject by thumping the jukebox. "Heyeaahh!" Thumbs up all around. "Well," Joanie says, "if nothing's going on, how about we all head out for a picnic? Come on Fonzie!"

Thirty minutes later, the gang is huddled underneath a bunch of trees clustered with beautiful grape vines. (Remember, "Happy Days" was set in Wisconsin but shot on location in California?) Joanie breaks out The FruitGuys crate: Liberty Apples, Comice Pears, Autumn Royal Grapes, pomegranates, and a sandwich with a special side of parsley just for the Fonz. "Hey Joanie, what gives?" moans Chachi. "That's not enough grapes for all of us." Just then the gang notices a lush cluster hanging right above their heads, just out of reach. Fonz gives the vine a little thump and a "Heyeaahh!" but to no avail - the grapes won't fall. Richie gets sore and, brushing his fox-red hair out of his eyes, grumbles, "Those grapes are probably sour anyway!" Luckily, Fonzie stays cool as a cucumber and remembers a line from Zen Motorcycle Maintenance and the Art of Seasonal Agriculture. "Those grapes aren't sour, Richie, but they are going out of season."

"That's right," Joanie chimes in. "But we've got an awful lot of great fruit to look forward to. Just check out these amazing Liberty Apples The FruitGuys found for us on the West coast - they're the first of the Washington crop and they're as sweet as Chachi's love notes. And don't forget about these Comice Pears from Stillwater Orchards in Courtland, CA and another round of pomegranates from Cruz Farm in Porterville!"

"Correctamundo, Shortcake!" Fonz is feeling good and combing his hair rapidly now. "FruitGuys Midwest customers will see the first Fuyu Persimmons of the year, and Eastcoasters are going to get a spectacular Cameo Apple from Kauffman's Fruit Farm in Lancaster, PA. Happy Days are here again!" Suddenly the boys break into an a cappella rendition of Leather Tuscadero's dance hit, "The Fonz." Everybody gets into the groovy moves: twist to the left, then right in a hitchhiking motion, click fingers, drop to one knee, then stand up with the thumbs-up.

 

Subscribe to the WEEKLY BITE

* indicates required

 

Recent The FruitLife articles:

Beehives, swales, and vermicomposting, oh my!
April 29, 2019
Spring fruit varieties and how to enjoy them
April 16, 2019
A tribute to the “Lemon Lady” of Redwood City
March 11, 2019
The FruitGuys New Year’s poem
January 8, 2019
Sowing the seeds of entrepreneurship
October 31, 2018
Give the delicious gift of farm-fresh fruit and healthy snacks
October 4, 2018
Summer to fall transition brings new fruit into the rotation
October 2, 2018
Bring some fruitful fun to your workplace on Tuesday, October 2
September 27, 2018
Farmer suicide is a public health threat and could hurt our food supply
August 14, 2018
How to keep your favorite fruit fresh through the summer heat
July 19, 2018

More recent articles:

Best onboarding practices
May 21, 2019
Quick, easy steps to spruce up your office space
May 14, 2019
Grilled portobello recipe
May 9, 2019
How to prepare physically and mentally for race day
May 9, 2019
Three simple ways to enjoy watermelon radishes
May 2, 2019
Easy spring salad recipe
April 25, 2019
Reduce plastic use with these earth-friendly alternatives
April 22, 2019
Food:
History of the tomato
April 18, 2019
How to make sure you’re getting enough iron in your diet
April 11, 2019
How fostering psychological safety increases performance
April 8, 2019

About Us

Our online magazine offers a taste of workplace culture, trends, and healthy living. It features recipes for easy, delicious work meals and tips on quick office workouts. It's also an opportunity to learn about our GoodWorks program, which helps those in need in our communities and supports small, sustainable farms.