humor

Layers of Health and Goggles

By Chris Mittelstaedt on

Lily, my four-year-old niece, who says things like, “Daddy, are you satisfied?” or “Mommy, what does the word "comely" mean?” decided last weekend that when going to swimming lessons one has a duty to …

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The Fountain of Fruit

By Chris Mittelstaedt on

Day 26: The marsh of cubicles has cursed our party. We lost Lenny two days ago to the gurgling fried dough found in the quicksand pits of a budget planning meeting. Sue has been eating the native …

Filed Under: FruitGuys News, The FruitLife Tagged With: ,

FruitGuy Noir

By Chris Mittelstaedt on

The Case of the Crate on the Web They were standing around the FruitCrate when all heck broke loose. Jane was trying to convince John that "grapefruit" descended from a dinosaur egg-sized fruit-grape …

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Myth Buster

By Chris Mittelstaedt on

By Chris Mittelstaedt On May 12th, 2007, the kids are still awake. My daughter has a quizzical look on her face as she skeptically slides her freshly-lost tooth under her pillow in a legal-sized …

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As The Orchard Turns 2

By Chris Mittelstaedt on

[SCENE: In a box on the back of a farmer's truck on the way to The FruitGuys.] NECTAR: To be or not to be! That is my question. Whether it is better to suffer the branches and soil of an …

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