During Shark Week on the Discovery Channel, and my all-things-marine-life son is loving it. Between South African great white sharks that launch themselves into the air after yelping seals, and the guy who said (and I quote): “I’m jumping in this shark melee tied to a bloody fish head to see what happens when sharks take hold in a feeding frenzy” you have to give credit to the Discovery Channel for taking nature and turning it into a giant tractor pull: “Shark Fans and Hot Rodders!!!”
I can’t help but wonder what kind of exciting twists and turns could come about if you took the same level of Ringling Brothers Circus–promotion to the fruit world. [Blurry fade-in with melting-wind-chime music”]
Narrator: “I’m here at FruitGuys East where we’re tracking The FruitGuys local buying and production staff. I’m putting out a box of locally grown Pennsylvania fruit and wearing only my wetsuit, oxygen tank, and mask. Let’s see what happens when I jump into the middle of The FruitGuys production staff’s packing melee!
[Narrator rolling around on the floor, talking quickly, out of breath.] “Son of a fish! The staff is actually going for the fruit and completely ignoring me! They’re stepping over me and not even aware that I’m here. It’s almost too much to believe that they haven’t seen or recognized this Emmy Award-winning face. Now they’re swarming in an unbelievably orderly fashion around the box of Vanier plums from Beechwood Orchards. They’re taking a box of white and yellow peaches from Three Springs Fruit Farm and handling them with calm and tender ferocity. If I weren’t in this wetsuit and getting in their way, I’m sure they’d offer me a piece. This is local harvest at its most raw!”
OK—maybe it’s a stretch to impose the frenzied excitement of Shark Week onto the juicy serenity of the fruit world, but The FruitGuys is pretty excited as the non-California growing regions that we serve around the country are in their summer harvests. Look for lots of locally and regionally grown fruit from many of the small farmers that you support through your purchase.
Enjoy & Be Fruitful!
—Chris Mittelstaedt firstname.lastname@example.org