As The Orchard Turns 2

[SCENE: In a box on the back of a farmer’s truck on the way to The FruitGuys.]

NECTAR: To be or not to be! That is my question. Whether it is better to suffer the branches and soil of an orchard-lived life or travel and uncover the hidden mystery—that is the song of myself.

NECTARINE: [Gives Nectar a sidelong glance.]

NECTAR: Hi, I’m Nectar. I’m going to the city to find my destiny and possibly get into acting.

NECTARINE: Nice to meet you, kid.

NECTAR: Are we from the same orchard Mr. Round Nectarine Guy?

NECTARINE: Kid, we’re from the same tree.

NECTAR: WE’RE FAMILY!?! OH – MY – GOSH. ARE YOU, MY UNCLE!?!

NECTARINE: Calm down, kid. We’re just the same variety.

NECTAR: This is amazing! Do you know my secret name?!

NECTARINE: [Sighs.] We’re called Zee Fire Nectarines. Our inner flesh is yellow rather than white. Yellow nectarines tend to have more acid while white do not – thus the difference in the taste.

NECTAR: Taste? Wait a minute. What do you mean? Like only wear white after Memorial Day?

NECTARINE: No. Taste as in those who bite into us.

NECTAR: WHOA! HOLD ON HERE…

NECTARINE: Our family tree has three pit types: Freestone, semi-cling, and cling. These names tell eaters how the fruit is woven (or not woven) into the pit. Freestone means that the fruit and pit are separated, semi-cling is woven but not deeply; cling is where the fruit is directly embedded in the pit.

NECTAR: Let me get this straight. Are we going to be eaten?

NECTARINE: Kid, it’s our life’s work. We’re all about nourishment. It’s the circle of life. Didn’t you see The Lion King?

NECTAR: [Looks confused.]

NECTARINE: Look, it’s an earth thing. The orchard we grew in had different varieties of yellow nectarine trees – each tree responds differently to light and temperature. Our variety can be harvested earlier in the summer than others. New varieties will be harvested each week all summer. Zee Fire’s one week, Rose Brights later, then Ruby Diamonds, Spring Brights, Honey Diamonds – get it?

NECTAR: So this truck isn’t taking us to do summer theater together.

NECTARINE: [Smiles.] Our big show is keeping people healthy and nourished. Roll with it!

To find out exactly what fruits are in your box by region, go to fruitguys.com and click on “In the Mix.” Enjoy and be fruitful!

– Chris Mittelstaedt chiefbanana@fruitguys.com