FruitGuy Noir in The Stone Fruit Spinning Wheel

My catfish Bicycle was 20 minutes into their workout on our new aqua treadmill when their hydrophone rang.

“Blub, blub,” they mouthed in my direction, quickly transferring the call and motioning for me to pick up.

I put a headset on over my Monday hockey helmet. “Yell-o,” I said casually.

“Did you say “yellow?” A voice whispered tensely.

“Yes,” I whispered back.

“Then I’ve come to the right fruit detective. I’m back at the office and we’re eating FruitGuys fruit again but we’ve had some confusion.”

“Go on,” I said, taking notes in comic strip form.

“We’ve got a few people here who say peaches and nectarines are yellow and others who say they are white. We nearly had a blowout over wavelengths of light and the amount of rods and cones in our eyes. We need someone to settle this.”

“Uh huh,” I said, buying time while I finished making a sketch of myself sketching myself while meditating on a mountain top.

I put down my pen. “I can make this case quick,” I said slowly. “You are both right. Peaches and Nectarines can be both yellow or white.”

I quickly spun my stone fruit wheel of fortune and it landed right on the category: How peaches and nectarines are the same. I launched into the ways, ticking them off on the fingers of my fingerless gloves: Both can have

1) yellow or white flesh
2) round or flattened donut shapes
3) be freestone (flesh not attached to the pit aka stone) or  clingstone (flesh attached to pit)
4) both are low-calorie, high in vitamin C, which supports the immune system and healthier skin and tissues, vitamin A, beta carotene , which helps prevent atherosclerosis, and fiber, which lowers cholesterol 

“Vitamin C!” I yelled to Bicycle, who was turning over letters as fast as their fins allowed. Bicycle jumped up out of the water and did a backflip.

I spun again and hit “The differences between peaches and nectarines.” I was on a roll, and jumped on my unicycle to join Bicycle as we blubbed our answers together:

1.  Only peaches have fuzzy skin
2.  Only nectarines have smooth skin
3. Every variety of peach and nectarine tastes unique
4.  White-fleshed peaches and nectarines may ripen faster than yellow-fleshed ones

“Peaches and nectarines are sister fruits, they’re like fraternal twins where one of them (nectarines) got the fuzzless skin gene, while peaches got the fuzzy skin one.  

In terms of taste, yellow-fleshed peaches and nectarines are sweet and balanced with a slightly tarter and more acidic experience. White-fleshed peaches and nectarines are called “low” or “no-acid” which gives them a more sugary taste and a stronger perfume.”

The caller exhaled a calm sigh of relief.  “Thanks FruitGuy Noir. And make sure to tell Bicycle they are an awesome letter turner.’”  

Bicycle blubbed a smile.