Move Over Charlie Brown, it’s the Great Pomegranate!

By Jeff Koelemay

Dracula and Linus walk into a Halloween pumpkin patch. Linus says, “Hey, are you waiting for the great pumpkin too?” Dracula strokes his pointy chin and looks a little embarrassed. He’s been trying to go vegetarian lately. He tried the patch and hypnosis but only ended up getting twitchy and sleeping soundly through the night. The dark circles under his eyes are gone, and his normally pale complexion has a rosy hue. He feels horrible. “I’m vooking for my groovve again,” he says somewhat self-consciously. Linus, now looking around for Snoopy, sucks his thumb but accidentally hits a hangnail and draws some blood. Dracula’s eyes grow wide. He looks around frantically and spies a pomegranate tree. He floats up, grabs one, cracks it open and starts munching seeds. Deep ruby red juice drips down his chin as he laughs and vanishes into the night. Linus faints.

Pomegranates have been around longer than The Mummy – ancient varieties were cultivated in Mesopotamia, and they pack a nutritional wallop!

Pomegranates are a fantastic source of potassium and contain powerful antioxidants that can help protect your blood lipids and may stop plaque from accumulating on arterial walls. The trick is how to eat one in a white shirt. The juice, just like blood, will stain your clothes. We recommend breaking the fruit apart in a bowl of water to avoid any errant red spray. Then simply pick the dazzling red pods from the rind and eat. Bite down to release the flavorful juices into your mouth and either discard the tiny seed or swallow it for an extra boost of fiber. Then debate your favorite vampire among the titans of modern cinema: Max Schreck, Bela Lugosi, Gary Oldman, or Count Chocula.

And no, I’m sorry, you can’t borrow The FruitGuys BananaMan suit for your Halloween costume. But do have a safe holiday, enjoy and be fruitful!