Do you feel the calling of the hero, deep inside your banana self? It may seem strange, but The FruitGuys Bananas know more about heroism than your average snack. Every morning, these bananas wake up, put on their pants one leg at a time and get to work. If you’re a locally grown, organic piece of fruit, you can’t help but feel a sense of duty to your fellow humans. It’s just tough for bananas to watch people eating potato chips and candy instead of healthy snacks. They don’t know any better.
That’s where The FruitGuys come in. Under cover of darkness (mostly daylight though), boxes of fresh, delicious fruit are delivered to offices and schools all around the city. And when those unsuspecting people open up that box, crime-fighting fruits make themselves known in the break-room.
Yes, bananas carry a heavy burden. When these nutritious fruits are called to the line of duty, they must always step up to the task. There’s really no other choice. Inside The FruitGuys Banana brain, one can hear a constant humming noise that calls them to perform heroic deeds. Often mistaken for sinus pressure or allergies, the sound is more like dolphin echolocation. By sending a signal out into the air, a banana can know whether or not a human is eating healthy food. This signal is extremely powerful; it can reach from California to Pennsylvania, and all spots in between.
Once bananas learn that someone is eating poorly, they hop on The FruitGuys expressway (also known as a post-consumer cardboard box). Two tickets to a company office, pack your bags, we’re leaving. Overnight, these bananas can reach their desired destination without any jetlag or airline food poisoning. They like to keep in the same time zone. Then, in tandem with apples, pears, persimmons, oranges, and a whole caravan of other fruit heroes, they spread the word. Doughnuts and cookies tend to cower in fear when the fruit box lands.
If your office, school, or home is in dire need of fruit redemption, call the Bananas. They don’t mess around. You’ll find them at www.FruitGuys.com or 1-877-FRUIT-ME.
